Okay fellow moms I need ideas. J-man is driving me bonkers these days - very clingy, wanting to be held all the time(usually to see what I am doing) and whining. He has also figured out that he doesn't have to listen to me! Before a raised voice was enough to get him to stop or at least stop long enough for us to prevent massive disaster. Now he just continues on his way. Therefore I am having a hard time getting anything done - such as making dinner, loading the dishwasher, going to the bathroom ;-)
He may have a had a bit of a bug - the daycare he goes to had a bit of a diarrhea outbreak last week! Apparently the cramping is quite painful. His diapers have been runnier than normal but nothing too bad and today it seemed pretty much back to normal. No fever, teeth are all in, sleeping well, eating well.
I don't know if it is because daycare is so fun and there is so much activity that when he is home with me it is boring. He is good at playing by himself - or he used to be. So perhaps I was spoiled. Noe he'll play by himself but only if I am sitting in the same room - and preferably watching him. Although he usually doesn't want me to play with him - don't mess with Thomas or McQueen!! If I leave the room - even if it is just around the corner to the kitchen he is whining and crawling up my legs. Pushing/pulling me away from the sink, stove, table etc. The only time he isn't crawling up my legs is when he is watching TV/DVD. I am trying to get him to watch less TV as when we were all sick he watched quite a bit.
So my question to you - what sort of activities can I give him to keep him busy but out of trouble? Keeping in mind that due to his developmental delays he is about 18 months in language, and his sensory system is easily overloaded. Ideas, suggestions, sympathy ;-)
4 comments:
For sure if he's going to day care he's being overstimulated...other kids and constant attention.
I think that he doesn't listen to you because he knows he can get away with it. Something I just aw in a new light (I had heard it a million times!) is that consistency is the key! Every time you're little man does an offense he needs to be punished. Now I don't know how you discipline, but it needs to be every time. With my little guy I changed what I was doing just minorly and I noticed a difference right away! They won't do as much when they know they will get punished for not obeying.
As far as the whining goes, he's gonna have to learn that he can't have mom all the time, especially with a new baby coming. I, myself have a 20 month old, and a 5 month old. It was a bit challenging at first, but we all adjust.
Now you say he's about 18 months in language, that doesn't mean that he can't understand you! My son is 20 months and he understands everything I say! So because of this I discipline when he doesn't obey ex: 'Preston look at mom'...if he doesn't I ask again, and if he still won't he gets disciplined, I do this because I KNOW he understands when I tell him to look. Whether or not they are playing is not a reason not to obey!
I just encourage you to keep up what you're doing (I'm sure you're a great mom!:}) but maybe make a few changes and I'm sure you'll see huge results! It's often the little things that have the biggest result!
God Bless and I'll pray for ya!
Sorry to say that I don't have any suggestions, but you definitely have my sympathy! Taeya is like that occasionally, but it never lasts more than a few minutes once she loses interest. Hopefully you're able to find something that works for you both!
I think it might be his age to a certain degree. I discovered with Micah that I needed to "teach" him how to play. When he was really bored and whiny I would try to give him 5 or 10 minutes of my undivided attention and that would usually sustain him for another 20-30 minutes. I would get right down on the floor and play hockey or cars or colouring and most often it would spark enough interest that he would start playing without me. And then I would step away quietly and go back to whatever I was doing before. This worked great for us and just recently I've noticed that Micah is starting to initiate play by himself more and more. He has more imagination now.
You said J doesn't really want to play with you, so I don't know if that would work, but you probably still have some play ideas that J's never thought of before.
And, I don't know if you've already implemented a form of discipline, but I decided to use a "naughty corner" and I used it a LOT when we first started. J may just have to see that you're serious when you say NO and then he'll get the picture. I keep reminding myself that I am the parent and I decide what's best, not Micah. That gives me enough gumption to follow through with things... usually :)
SOooo my daughter, only she has always been like that! I include both my kids in as much as I can that I am doing. If I am making dinner I find silly little jobs for them.... stand on the chair I will cut up the veggies and you can transport them into the frying pan while it's cold. Helping me empty the dishwasher.... they either hand me all the dishes or put them on the counter for me. Also a bit of reverse psychology... the more I want my kids the less they want me. So I do the old.... I'm gonna come chase you and kiss you... they run I run behind them for a bit... grab them kiss them... let them go... tell them I'm going to chase them some more.... run into the kitchen.... do some more cooking..... when they discover my dissapearance and come looking for me.... I chase them for another moment..... and do it all again. The more I request my kids come and snuggle with me... the more they run off finding things to do without me! But really, I just try to find little things they can do to help... folding laundry they get all the face cloths....they don't do a very nice job folding them... but they sure love how exited I am when they try and appreciate what big helpers they are! Good luck!
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